Someone once told me that for something to become a habit, you had to do it for four weeks, consistently. I remember trying this with regard to wearing contact lenses. At that time I wore them occasionally, and more often than not forgot them. Four weeks of planned and continued use and then for years I wore contact lenses each day, without thought.
So on that basis (and I do have other examples), doing something regularly for a relatively short period, should enable things to become habitual - something you do automatically, without thinking or questioning. This is probably the case, or at least the starting point.
While this was a personal example, the same should work for habits at work right? well yes.. but how many of us have managed to do something consistently enough for it to become a habit where we really feel it matters, and what impacts it?
My personal view is that we allow ourselves to become sidetracked and distracted. It's always busy, always! There are constant emails, IM's, texts and cloud requests that require our attention and I'm not even going to mention the little red flashing light on the phone to tell you that you have a new message.. no.. I'm not going to look.. I'm doing something else... no.. ok.. well it might be important.. or ...
OK.. and I'm back with you, the phone light has been turned off.
I remember attending the launch of a previous company's New Employee Orientation programme. The CEO and members of the Executive Management team presented on the history, the solutions and the future and it was great... but there was one particular sentiment that resonated with me; that we, as individuals, have to decide on and keep our own focus in a slightly chaotic environment.
Most company's I have worked for have been slightly chaotic in the way they work. They can change direction, process and approach regularly and it is so easy to get caught up in playing catch up ... managing our emails - ensuring questions are dealt with - getting that report done ... that we forget to look at the bigger picture and remember where we are going. I am sure I am not alone in working for this kind of company! What are we supposed to be doing to make the company and ourselves successful? We should be focusing on the things that will make a difference.
And I am also sure that it many cases it isn't just our "Company's" that are slightly chaotic, anyone with children or dependants is likely to be in a similarly chaotic environment outside of work too... from juggling nursery and school drop off's and collections, dog walking, clubs, activities, cooking, cleaning and homework management, Honestly, some days it is a miracle that we haven't left a child with some other family, or at the gymnastics club! So all the more reason to ensure that focus also applies to our home lives too .. I mean .. does it really matter if the house isn't tidy if you get to play "Settlers of Catan" as a family one evening?
Which brings us back to habits (via a rather long winded route I admit). In order to keep FOCUS you don't need to consistently keep track of the little things, you need to keep track of the BIG STUFF, the things that will make a difference to you, your life, your role and your company (not necessarily in that order).
For me, this means keeping a draft email open where I write down the big stuff that I need to remember because when I have gotten caught up in the latest urgent requests for information and actions driven by that little red flashing light on the phone, I sometimes need a quick reminder of the fun stuff I still need to develop and work on that I know will make a difference in my role, and to the company as a whole.
And remember! The "big stuff" list doesn't just apply to work - put on there the things you need to do to keep your life balanced too... whether for this week that means going to the gym twice, or attending your son's end of term assembly.. if it isn't on the list, you might prioritise something else over it, and would you really want to miss a rousing rendition of "summer holidays" by 150 children?
Monday, 26 March 2012
Thursday, 20 January 2011
Its been a while...
More than 6 months have passed since the last blog... life didn't get any quieter and the work life balance thing is still work in Progress.... BUT... I think its getting there.
So what's been happening... One of the main things to regain work life balance was being able to take most of August off with the children and hubbie and we spent a pleasant few weeks "Glamping".
Now I've not been a huge fan of camping for a fairly long time. The idea of getting dressed while lying down or still in the sleeping bag so you don't freeze is something I stopped doing when I was a teenager completing my Duke of Edinburgh award. BUT, in the interests of family harmony, the option of Glamping (camping in a big tent, under a poly tunnel with proper beds and a duvet) was something I figured would please everyone. Hubbie and kids would be "camping" and I would still be sleeping in a bed and be able to stand up to get dressed!
The location (North Cornwall) was stunning and the farm was great. The "Glamppod" was stunning on first view... and remained so for the holiday. But there were challenges... no electricity... Cornish weather and GIANT SPIDERS to name but a few.
The spider (Bertha) lived in the toilet shed.. (and yes, I do mean toilet "shed") and came out at night... just as everyone needed to go to the loo before bed. I really really don't like spiders... especially ones the size of mugs... BIG mugs...
Bertha the spider was joined in our camp by two toads, Natter and Jack.. an excited review of the various nature books made us think they were Natter-jack toads (hence the name) and they lived behind various plants and were happy to share the shower with us.. a privilege not to be sniffed at, although slightly disconcerting!
Cooking dinner on a BBQ or two ring calor gas stove was also an exciting treat, especially with a 14 month old running around.... and remembering to cook early enough so you can still see what you are cooking is a lesson well learned. BUT, in fairness the children didn't say a word about the charcoal they were served with slightly under cooked rice on one occasion.
It was a great break, with lots of outdoors, walking, sheep, beaches, sheep, ducks, surfing, sheep, pub lunches (to make up for the awful dinners!) and fresh air. BUT when hubbie this evening suggested 2 weeks camping in a proper tent this year I had to draw the line... we may agree on a week of camping, but the second week has to be somewhere with a proper bed and hot running water!
So what's been happening... One of the main things to regain work life balance was being able to take most of August off with the children and hubbie and we spent a pleasant few weeks "Glamping".
Now I've not been a huge fan of camping for a fairly long time. The idea of getting dressed while lying down or still in the sleeping bag so you don't freeze is something I stopped doing when I was a teenager completing my Duke of Edinburgh award. BUT, in the interests of family harmony, the option of Glamping (camping in a big tent, under a poly tunnel with proper beds and a duvet) was something I figured would please everyone. Hubbie and kids would be "camping" and I would still be sleeping in a bed and be able to stand up to get dressed!
The location (North Cornwall) was stunning and the farm was great. The "Glamppod" was stunning on first view... and remained so for the holiday. But there were challenges... no electricity... Cornish weather and GIANT SPIDERS to name but a few.
The spider (Bertha) lived in the toilet shed.. (and yes, I do mean toilet "shed") and came out at night... just as everyone needed to go to the loo before bed. I really really don't like spiders... especially ones the size of mugs... BIG mugs...
Bertha the spider was joined in our camp by two toads, Natter and Jack.. an excited review of the various nature books made us think they were Natter-jack toads (hence the name) and they lived behind various plants and were happy to share the shower with us.. a privilege not to be sniffed at, although slightly disconcerting!
Cooking dinner on a BBQ or two ring calor gas stove was also an exciting treat, especially with a 14 month old running around.... and remembering to cook early enough so you can still see what you are cooking is a lesson well learned. BUT, in fairness the children didn't say a word about the charcoal they were served with slightly under cooked rice on one occasion.
It was a great break, with lots of outdoors, walking, sheep, beaches, sheep, ducks, surfing, sheep, pub lunches (to make up for the awful dinners!) and fresh air. BUT when hubbie this evening suggested 2 weeks camping in a proper tent this year I had to draw the line... we may agree on a week of camping, but the second week has to be somewhere with a proper bed and hot running water!
Tuesday, 1 June 2010
The fight for work life balance.... starts here.
Well its certainly been a while since I've blogged anything! .. Life has been manic, working ridiculous hours and then trying to remember which child to pick up, from where, and drop to where, and whether they need feeding.. No, I don't suppose it should be difficult, there are only three children and one of them has a very limited social life due to his young age, but somehow it has seemed almost impossible to remember it, let alone juggle it. But when you work late in the evening and on the weekend so you can have one Monday afternoon off, and you work evening after evening and still have in excess of 1000 emails in your mailbox, it does go somewhere to explaining the "OMG what day is it" feeling you have by about 5pm each day.
However.. so far... I haven't forgotten to collect one yet, although it came close with the littlest one when at 5.50pm we remembered he was still at nursery.. (latest collection is 6pm and a late pick up is almost an "jailing event").. Luckily we live minutes away and little E was whisked home for lots of attention and cuddles with both hideously guilty feeling parents.
While I keep thinking that work will "quieten down", these "changes" will be the last and managers will in fact learn to manage their staff (oh please!) it doesn't change... it doesn't get quieter and looking into the work related tunnel ahead I have the almost overwhelming feeling that the light I can see is a train!
So.. "do something else", says my 10 year old daughter, "leave and work elsewhere" says hubbie.. and while they are both probably right, its unlikely to happen anytime soon. Why? well... we do have some great people there who want , need and appreciate HR support, whether they are managers or individual employees; we have a good HR team; but probably more key is a feeling of "not done yet"... that if I was to leave now I wouldn't know whether all the changes and pain had been worth it? and, in leaving, it would have been a waste of time; of hours spent. But, there still needs to be some kind of mental endpoint here, a time at which you have to think, "ok, my work is done", or you realise that banging your head against the wall is probably not going to make it all go away.
And in the meantime, while work eats up time, hours and days go by where your children continue to grow up. Little E has just turned 1, and where on earth did that time go... I have been back at work 6 months and feel, somedays, like I have missed a lifetime with him. And its the same with the older two as well, while time doesn't appear to pass so quickly with them, it is measured in terms and holidays and this school year is nearly over. One more term and my eldest is in the last year of primary school ... moving up to secondary school... becoming a teenager.. I remember when that was me, how can my daughter be there now!
A wonderful HR Director (and boss) of mine once said something along the lines of "insanity is doing the same thing again and again and expecting a different result"...and he is right. So something needs to change!
So .. what will change? Hopefully workload, but realistically probably not, so... work life balance will have to be fought for and some work not done.. that may be work work, or housework, but the battle to have time to be with the family and meet friends again is going to be fought and, if not won, then maybe thats the mental endpoint and I'll go set up my knitting shop that sells great flapjack!
However.. so far... I haven't forgotten to collect one yet, although it came close with the littlest one when at 5.50pm we remembered he was still at nursery.. (latest collection is 6pm and a late pick up is almost an "jailing event").. Luckily we live minutes away and little E was whisked home for lots of attention and cuddles with both hideously guilty feeling parents.
While I keep thinking that work will "quieten down", these "changes" will be the last and managers will in fact learn to manage their staff (oh please!) it doesn't change... it doesn't get quieter and looking into the work related tunnel ahead I have the almost overwhelming feeling that the light I can see is a train!
So.. "do something else", says my 10 year old daughter, "leave and work elsewhere" says hubbie.. and while they are both probably right, its unlikely to happen anytime soon. Why? well... we do have some great people there who want , need and appreciate HR support, whether they are managers or individual employees; we have a good HR team; but probably more key is a feeling of "not done yet"... that if I was to leave now I wouldn't know whether all the changes and pain had been worth it? and, in leaving, it would have been a waste of time; of hours spent. But, there still needs to be some kind of mental endpoint here, a time at which you have to think, "ok, my work is done", or you realise that banging your head against the wall is probably not going to make it all go away.
And in the meantime, while work eats up time, hours and days go by where your children continue to grow up. Little E has just turned 1, and where on earth did that time go... I have been back at work 6 months and feel, somedays, like I have missed a lifetime with him. And its the same with the older two as well, while time doesn't appear to pass so quickly with them, it is measured in terms and holidays and this school year is nearly over. One more term and my eldest is in the last year of primary school ... moving up to secondary school... becoming a teenager.. I remember when that was me, how can my daughter be there now!
A wonderful HR Director (and boss) of mine once said something along the lines of "insanity is doing the same thing again and again and expecting a different result"...and he is right. So something needs to change!
So .. what will change? Hopefully workload, but realistically probably not, so... work life balance will have to be fought for and some work not done.. that may be work work, or housework, but the battle to have time to be with the family and meet friends again is going to be fought and, if not won, then maybe thats the mental endpoint and I'll go set up my knitting shop that sells great flapjack!
Saturday, 13 February 2010
A sandwich short of a picnic or a modern day Nancy Drew?
It occurs to me occasionally that some people must think, that if you work in HR, you must be a few sandwiches short of a picnic. The reason this occurs to me is that people seem to think that they can get away with things that your average 10 year old would spot as "dodgy" but, for some reason, they happily try and get these things past their HR department.
One thing that any length of time in HR will give you, is a healthy dose of cynicism and a nose for the suspicious and we can't resist looking into things that just don't add up.
Take, for instance, absence... its not often that you have to actually track the number of "grandmother's funeral's" that any one particular employee has to attend, but it does happen! Equally, some people haven't realised that being sick every Monday is likely to raise alarm bells and we WILL ask for reasons, and won't accept "flu" for such short, regular, absences.
I remember when the swineflu epidemic was in full swing employees and employers were all overly cautious about transferring and catching bugs. People calling in sick left, right and centre claiming "SwineFlu". Interestingly, a colleague of mine sent two of his employees to have independent tests when they claimed they had the dreaded virus... neither tested positive and the company didn't have any further claims from employees, who diligently continued to turn up for work. Hmm....
However, it is expense claims that bring out the Sherlock Holmes in us HR people, and continue to amaze us at the cheek of some employees. Vague receipts from foreign trips often turn out to be lunch, dinner or tea, but have also turned out on investigation to be clothes, adult movies, massages or even tennis lessons .... Thank heavens for the internet, a sense of humour and for employees who claim that a bill for headwear is in fact lunch! .. well, I'll eat my hat!
One thing that any length of time in HR will give you, is a healthy dose of cynicism and a nose for the suspicious and we can't resist looking into things that just don't add up.
I remember when the swineflu epidemic was in full swing employees and employers were all overly cautious about transferring and catching bugs. People calling in sick left, right and centre claiming "SwineFlu". Interestingly, a colleague of mine sent two of his employees to have independent tests when they claimed they had the dreaded virus... neither tested positive and the company didn't have any further claims from employees, who diligently continued to turn up for work. Hmm....
However, it is expense claims that bring out the Sherlock Holmes in us HR people, and continue to amaze us at the cheek of some employees. Vague receipts from foreign trips often turn out to be lunch, dinner or tea, but have also turned out on investigation to be clothes, adult movies, massages or even tennis lessons .... Thank heavens for the internet, a sense of humour and for employees who claim that a bill for headwear is in fact lunch! .. well, I'll eat my hat!
Tuesday, 9 February 2010
Hair Removal from laptop!
Juggling work and life took on an extra dimension today when I found myself needing to explain why my keyboard was "slightly" full of hair cuttings.....
About a week ago I found myself in a lift with a Senior Manager who commented "blimey, you're going grey!, i didn't think you were that old!" Something of a double edged compliment I think!
Right, thinks me... having advised the exec that I was obviously too busy working to worry about such things... what's the soonest I can get my hair done!!! The answer.. was today... lunchtime... a Tuesday! nothing before, and heaven help us next week is half term so no appointments then (hairdresser also juggles work life balance) and by this time I was so aware of my roots I was starting to feel like a badger!
So today finds me rushing into work, rushing around, and rushing out like a mad thing at 12pm so I can work from home (and use my lunch break to get my hair done). The problem is that "getting your hair done" for most women, takes significantly longer than an hour, in this case 2 hours!
Now I'm also not one for sitting down and reading Hello or Ok, so I figured I'd just work on my laptop. My Hairdresser (the very brilliant Julia who just made me look 15 years younger) works from home so sitting there with a laptop open while your head is being plastered with "gunk" is less embarrassing than in a salon, but just as unpractical in some respects.
Take for instance having to dodge flying gloop from hitting the screen and avoiding taking calls as your blackberry ends up a "purplebrownberry" (and probably stops working!)
But, with internet and email access and a couple of cups of tea, I was set... until it came to the cutting part. It doesn't seem to matter that the computer is placed on the very edge of your knees, or even balanced on the worktop.. hair travels.... it travels quickly and it travels in groups! I am sure IT will lend me some keyboard cleaning kit but in the meantime a quick upturn and blast with the hairdryer seems to have done the trick.
And... I now have "proper" hair again, its amazing what that does for your confidence, although Hubby is going to be sleeping in the shed as he completely failed to notice!
ttfn!
Sunday, 7 February 2010
A Day at the Zoo
Today's treat was a trip to the zoo. As both the older children were away this weekend, and "junior" doesn't really mind where he goes as long as he's fed, watered and entertained, the "treat" was really for me! I love zoo's, always have and probably always will.
Particular highlights of the day at Marwell ... Giraffe's trying to keep warm, Ocelots looking cute and cuddly while you know that they would have your arm off, and the rather odd looking but impressive Ant Eater.
It was the anteater in particular which seemed to captivate little one today. We stood watching him parade around his enclosure for a good 15 minutes, and "Parade" was a very good word for it as he was almost putting on a show. Stalking along the perimeter, turning and swishing his tail and sticking his nose out jauntily as if to an audience; which at this point was only two very cold adults and a 9 month old baby giggling hysterically! But then I guess every star has to start somewhere.
I think my personal favorite animals of the day though were the two new snow leopards they have just acquired. Both were tucked up and sleeping at the back of the enclosure and looked absolutely amazing. Hopefully next time we visit they will be a little more active.
Friday, 5 February 2010
First ever blog
I mentioned to a friend who "twitters" that I had thought about setting up a blog.. obviously I felt I had wise words and interesting tales to publish! What surprised me was that they thought it was a great idea.. and even directed me at blogspot... so here I am!
So who am I? Well, there are a number of answers to that question; A Mum to three children, the oldest being 10 years and the youngest being 9 months; A wife to a wonderful husband who is a calm, steady and understanding influence on my life; an HR Manager in the hi-tec world... which on some days is a little like being a Mum to a stroppy 10 year old; and ME ... someone who does all of those things and try's to remember that she is still an individual and doesn't want to spend the evening picking up everyones laundry.
What am I going to blog about? I think this will develop as time goes by, but my hope is it will allow me to share whats happening in my world with friends, make people smile and just occasionally make people think.
So .. this is the first blog... more will follow...
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